Life comes at you from every direction. We use logic in our everyday to connect point A to point B and it all seems to make sense. We referee other peoples relationships, thinking we know best and question why they just can’t see it all as crystal clear as we do. But in the midst of our own personal dilemmas, when we’re one cliche relationship past, 10 tequila shots deep or a dead end job later we find ourselves wondering why we just didn’t get what to do. Why we couldn’t just listen to our own advice?
It may have to do with the fact that we have to live with our own consequences while when we counsel others we only consider the long term benefits. Maybe we do know what to do but the aftermath is just something we don’t have the capacity to deal with in the moment. Whatever the reason we just don’t seem to apply the same rules to our own lives as we would ask others to live by. Only once we’ve asked another for advice to validate our thinking do we occasionally give ourselves the go-ahead.
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn’t. -Erica Jong
When we’re hurting or in need of direction, our friends will often recycle the same advice to us as we had previously given them, but we just can’t seem to apply it. We ignore what we had previously asked them to value and we handle our lives recklessly.
When it comes down to it, hindsight is 20/20. Taking your own advice is easiest if you reflect back on previous experience. When you’ve been in a similar dilemma in the past chances are you knew the answer. It was all so clear, yet you couldn’t think of what to do at the time of the event. Your past experiences always tell the truth; If you want different results, do something different.
If it’s about making an uncomfortable decision such as choosing to travel afar, go back to school at a later age or breaking it off with someone we must treat it like ripping off a bandaid. The distressing feeling may be drastic or painful but will not last forever. Sometimes the unknown can be daunting but refreshing.
We all just want the best possible outcome but we can’t control the future so we should choose what we know is right versus what we think will wield the outcome we would like. The next time a friend asks you for advice, you should only give advice you’d feel comfortable taking. It’s time to live by the same code of conduct you wish to preach.