Kim Kardashian posted a new photo to her Instagram account recently – ERMAGERDDD! It seems as though this reality star/porn star/wifey of Kayne has a new title to add to her books. Let me introduce the world renowned author: Kim Kardashian! Can’t you see it now? I certainly can’t, but a member of the KKKKKK clan is excited about her new book.

On her post she says:

Kim Kardashian Paper magazine coverSo proud to share the cover of my book Selfish, out in May! Thank you Rizzoli for making this happen & being the best partner. A big thank you to the Donda team & Kanye for inspiring this idea & helping to design this book so I can share a decade of selfies in such an intimate & artistic way! Can’t wait for you to all see this book! Xo #Selfish #Rizzoli #Donda

The only thing that doesn’t surprise me about this is that the book is called “Selfish” — actually what am I talking about — nothing about this surprises me.

Now for the most important part — the cover. Just think, what is the most selfish thing Kim could put on the cover of her book? Think long and hard about this. But, not too hard, you don’t want to furrow your brows and get wrinkles.


Yes, she chose a selfie for the cover. And instead of featuring her shiny plastic butt, she revealed a different side of her. You’re probably thinking — a more nurturing side, a heart-warming side, or something along those lines, but I simply meant her boobs.

I guess this shouldn’t shock us. I’m just disappointed that the Kardashians are now going to be littering bookshelves everywhere soon. The hardest part is going to be seeing the “Bestseller” sticker “motorboating” Kim’s boobs. Why world why?

It’s going to be one of those books that people secretly take on the train to read with another book cover concealing Kim’s precious face. A book we will want to hate, but love to read. I’m betting you’re all pumped for May to roll around so you can get your own copy and read about Kim’s fascinating life.

I’m sure we’ll all learn lots and her book will change the world for the better. JK only destruction can come from this.

Tagged with →